Whenever friends ask me how long they should wait between their engagement and their wedding, I always say if they want to keep their sanity, it’s best to have a minimum of a year to plan. As someone who has written about weddings since 2015, I know all too well the length of time it takes to book a great venue, curate a vendor team, alter a dress, and prepare guests for travel. But much to my surprise, I found myself throwing out all my rules—and self-inducing a stress-related teeth-clenching problem—by planning and throwing my own wedding in just a month.
Of course, I didn’t originally intend to have a whirlwind wedding timeline. My fiancé Olivia and I first got engaged in June 2024 and have been (and still are) planning to host a large celebration in November 2025. But on November 6, the election results went differently than we hoped—and we decided that getting legally married before the new administration came into office might be a safer decision for us as a queer couple. While we briefly entertained the idea of a quick NYC courthouse marriage, we agreed that hosting a proper wedding with a few family members present would make this moment feel special rather than rushed.
Luckily, our parents thought it was a great idea, too. My parents, my brother, and his girlfriend were on standby to book flights out from California. Liv’s mom Kerri told her friend and boss Mark Jacobsen, and he sweetly let us know he was ordained and offered to officiate for us. After writing an article about my fears for the queer community after the election, many friends in the wedding community offered their support to Liv and me—including wedding photographer Corbin Gurkin, who kindly offered to shoot for us once we decided on a time and place.
With our family, photographer, and officiant on board, it was time to get planning. While Liv was involved in all the decision-making, she allowed me to take the reins. We wanted the wedding to feel authentic to both of us, yet as someone whose day-to-day life is centered around weddings anyway and doesn’t have a traditional nine-to-five, it made sense for me to handle logistics. With such a short timeline, I would likely need to dedicate a good amount of time to research and running around for last-minute errands. Liv and I had always loved the idea of a chic city dinner party wedding with wine and bowls of pasta flowing, so we thought about looking into private spaces at restaurants for 15.